Ohhhh.... it's too good to be wasted

So after 3 long years of silence on the great virtues of how to win and how to keep from getting voted off, what not to wear and who not to bring to the show representing you.... I'm back.

Why? Well somehow this season has got me sucked in already. How? Well if you don't like this year's contestants... well, somethings wrong with ya'. SOMETHING WRONG WITH 'YA.

I mean who could resist the all too fabulous church boy Danny? And who the hell let that crazy ass Tatiana stay on the show? OK. here's what happened: the producers sat in a 3 hour meeting discussing how all they had this year was talent. No drama, just talent. No 3 divas who would eventually grow to rock star diva levels and one by one be picked off until the end. No cool rocker dudes who just might up-end this very cool pop star, pop singing competition. No baby mama drama, late night arrests, I am the better singing brother of the dude from last year drama (they already got rid of him.) Nothing. What could they possibly do this year to keep the drama alive and well? Tatiana. Really now. When a judge (Simon) has to start a conversation with "try not to be so annoying for a minute" you need to step back and look at your crazy behind.

Crazy indeed. Crazy like a fox. Did you see that girl tonight?!?! For those of you who missed it somehow... you can recreate it by playing Tatiana back from last week only let her take 7 muscle relaxants first. Seriously. She was like Tracy Morgan at the dinner table with Obama she was so calm and mild mannered. (Can you picture it? Can't stop laughing...)

Anywho. Enough useless banter. I'm back and here's what I think in a nutshell about the way they're going to whittle the top 36 down to the the top 12:

Wrong. It's just wrong, wrong, wrong people. How do you get a group of talent like that together and then say "Psych! Only 3 of you are gonna be here after tomorrow night when America gets rid of the rest of your butts." What happened to the days where this phase of the competition took oh... 3 or 4 months to get through??? Now in only 3 weeks we'll be to the Wild Card Round already! But wait, who is as excited as I am about the wild card coming back?!?! I LOVE this move. LOVE it.

Tonight's show was a long boring 2 hours. So boring that I can recap the whole thing by saying this:

Those of you who picked those crazy hideous songs to sing - and you know who you are (casey, michael, ann marie ((to whom i have to give a shout out to because she's a friend of a friend - hey girl keep your dream alive!)), stephen, jackie, stevie) you all got your wishes... to see your family and friends again. Uh huh, tomorrow. Cause you're all going home.

Now to the middle of the road (but still gonna find their butts on a plane) - alexis and one other person that I can't even remember - that's how mediocre...

And the only ones who showed us their talent - Danny, Ricky and Anoop Dawg. Look, can i just stop for a minute to say that I'm so disgusted that potentially only ONE guy is gonna go on because there weren't any girls that deserve that spot. And that's the hard truth. Ricky - he was a sleeper...never saw him coming... but I'm staying loyal to my boy Danny. My WWJD Danny. LOVES me some Danny... wish his friend would have made it with him cause that would have been a good story. And how fabulous is this R&B boy with a name like Anoop?! WHA?! Go on with your bad self. Sadly... Anoop did not pick a great song to showcase the goods but with a voice like that does not deserve to be in my first category. My guess is he will be a wildcard pick.

You'll notice... Tatiana is not in any of the categories. That's because she deserves her own. The "Oh Lord, Jesus, Save me now, cause I'm about to snatch her off the stage" category. People... do not let crazy fool ya. Crazy is as crazy does Forrest Gump says. (maybe that's not exactly what he says but close enough). Oh, she worked really hard to reel in the crazy tonight... I'll give her that. But folks... two words: SHE CRAZY.

Crazy and she'll get voted thru. Why? Cause the voters are crazy too. Maybe since Obama won we will see a shift to the more conscientious voters... maybe. Just remember people - yes we can.... vote off the crazy!

Peace out ya'll and remember...

It is what it is.