Wild Card

I wholeheartedly agree with those of you out there thinking that getting rid of the wild card feature was one of AI's biggest mistakes.

I do like the way the judges massacre the heck out of the Hollywood bound by putting them on the chopping block so quickly (and often) once they arrive in Hollywood. It's a good way to come up with this semi-final group. But then once we vote this group down, I think the judges should bring a wild-card choice in to stir things up. Perhaps it could be anyone from the Hollywood group and later. AND they could actually replace someone who shouldn't have made it that far with their wild card choice. I think they should be able to dismiss someone and replace them with their wild card choice. Yes! That's it. That would do it for me. What a moment that would be. Everyone is back on the chopping block in that one moment.

O.k. doing it that way would make up for stupid voting - people voted off too early (Patrick) or people getting through who have overstayed their welcome - think back to goat girl, red-haired crooner & marine boy. It could also give the judges a chance for a "do over" if they were on the bubble about someone who maybe should have gotten a shot in the first place.

The argument of course with the wild card performer is that this person is dropped back into the competition all fresh and ready to go without having suffered through all the stress and strain that the others have just endured for weeks. Whatever. There's nothing equal and fair about the whole thing if I'm keeping it real for you folks. People can vote for anyone for any reason in any quantity they desire on any given week. There's no guarantee that anyone is getting through based on their actual talent anyway so why worry about it? Give us a wild card pick. Come on FOX .... do it... I triple dog dare you.

Hey, but that's just me. And what do I know.

Anyway.... I'm sure you've guessed that this all to say that I don't think Patrick should have been voted off yet. There were clearly worse performances. But you know, what did I say about him after the performance show? That he was forgettable. That I didn't even remember his performance either by the time we were dialing 1-866-vote a friend - and I loved this guy's voice. What did I remember on the other hand? His super freaky friends in the audience! That's what we were talking about instead of his voice...

Lesson learned I hope. Never take friends to the show that may upstage you. I'd have mistakenly voted for them if they had a number flashed under their faces... that's how much more memorable they were.

I'm out.

Oh the pain of it all...

What the heck?!?!

WHAT THE.......

(((sigh))) I'm here. And you know, I started watching this season and was sooooo uninspired. I was thinking maybe this is it. You know, like when Survivor got to like island #56 or something... just not all that interesting anymore.

But then they flew their butts to Hollywood and started singing to me. Calling me back. And when Taylor Hicks strolled his Ray Charles behind down the middle of that judging room blowing some heat on that harmonica.... ya'll I knew I'd lost my mind. It was over. I was back.

So Shonda talked about the girls. And I'm with ya'... Now the boys last night... that's all a TiVo fast forward moment except for 3 people. I mean is there no advice for these boys on their song choices? That was just painful in some cases. Truly painful.

Sway... I LOVES ME SO SWAY... but honey absolutely a brutal song choice. Now get this. I liked it after I played it back a few times. But I didn't love it. And it made my ears bleed the first time I watched it. I knew Simon was gonna massacre him cause he HATES that whole falsetto thing like he hates wearing white shirts. But I think he has the lady appeal which is what drew me in after playing it back a few times. You CAN hear pretty Shonda. I think you can. (or I did anyway last night!)

Patrick - once again I love this guy's voice but the song choice was horrible. Sad really. Hopefully he won't be forgotten. I had forgotten him by the end of the show myself sadly. Not until I saw the playbacks did I go "Oh... I should remember to vote for him."

Taylor - another bad song choice for an amazing voice. Please stick to your old bluesy, r&b, old southern stuff and leave that song alone.

Ace - oh he's good. Yummyliscous and a good singer. This boy can sing his butt off and unlike the others, he selected a perfect song. PERFECT for his voice and vibe and all that was yummyliscious about George Michael was oozing out of this kid too. BUT I was feeling a little like vomiting when he channeled Constantine at the end. I HATED that Constantine thing. If you're listening honey I have some advice: For the love of God Ace drop that crap now!

HHhhmmm... my rocker dude Chris. I loved that number. First of all I love that song. Yep, I love a little rock just like the next girl out there. And I love this boy for some reason. Rough and rocker, but not all Joe Cocker kinds of weird like Bo was. (Oh don't all act like it's just me who felt that way about Bo. Ya'll know you thought that too.) Clean cut, rocker. Doesn't get any better - in a rocker sort of world.

And the best of the show in my opinion: Elliott. The best male voice no question. Crazy soulful white boy with a last name like Yamin? HUH?!?! Go on with your bad self! But let me say this... he does not have what Ace and Sway have... the looker thing. Spend some of your first recording contract dollars on some dental work baby. It's o.k..... I'm still voting for you all the way.

Best 2 moment of the show: For all you TiVoers... go back and watch Patrick's performance. Just the end and through the judging when they show "Patrick's Friends" caption under 2 of THE scariest, freakiest people who look every bit of 55 years old cheering him on in the audience I've ever seen in my life. I played that back over and over again. My remote is worn out. It's a better audience moment than Fantasia's pimp looking, gold lame shirt, fedora wearing daddy ever was. SCARY. I'm not so sure the woman isn't a drag queen... and that's o.k. if she is... but I'm sorry, don't go to support your friend getting his big break on AI in bad drag. That's just a tip. (And don't go writing me about how I'm a drag queen hater... cause I sooooo am not. But I do give sound advice about social situations and t.v. camera moments - drag queen or not. Get your hair and makeup done professionally or something is all I'm saying!) O.k. I couldn't help it. I just ran back to my t.v. and watched it again. Oh stop! Just stop the madness. I can't stop laughing.

O.k. the 2nd great moment was when Simon told that freaky Gedeon character that his smile was scary, creepy or whatever it was it was just flat out howling F-U-N-N-Y.

Alright. That's my take on things right now for the guys. Results are coming on.

I'm out.

Okay, okay, OKAY already...

So I had no intention of blogging.

Not this season.

I mean, I had the intention but things got busy and life got busy and besides, those damn audition shows GET ON MY NERVES what with all the sad crazy folk out there who think they can sing and then get on TV and get made fools of. It makes me sad, those people with their delusions. Because, hey, I like to sing as much as the next person -- in the shower. But even I can hear how bad I sound. And if I couldn't hear it, at least my family loves me enough to not let me go on believing I'm Whitney when I am clearly not. But these people...clearly, they have no one who loves them. Because there they are on the TV screen, howling like cats and acting all shocked when Simon yells at them.

Which is a long way of saying, I had decided that my love affair with AI was over.

AI and I were getting a divorce.

But I couldn't stop sneaking a peek at the Tivo every once in a while to see what was going down. And so it happened.

What always freaking happens.

THIS STUPID SHOW HOOKED ME AGAIN!!!

Tonight was...well, the word for the night is "adorable." Yep, adorable. Why? Three names -- Lisa, Paris and Katherine. Could there be three girls on the planet more made for this competition?

I. Don't. Think. So.

Two of them are barely out of diapers at 16 and one is barely legal at 21. And they sing so good. They sing so good that they make up for last season. Remember the Diva Season? With the three divas who could SANG? Remember Fantasia? Remember the good old days?

These girls were better than the good old days. Mainly because they were so adorable that I wanted to wrap them up like presents and take them home. Plus, they had talent.

Thank the Gods for talent.

Now, y'all know there were some bad performances tonight too. What was up with the chick who thought she was a rocker? Why was she there? Was she there because Randy and Simon thought she was hot? Because pretty don't reach the ears, people. Becky needs to go be on America's Next Top Model and leave us alone. That's my career advice for the night.

I am more excited for the men tomorrow. Y'all, I'm in love with the gray haired boy. IN LOVE. Taylor Hicks is my new pretend husband. He's so Ray Charles meets crazy country boy. I adore him. ADORE. LOVE. ADORE.

Okay, let me calm myself.

I also have a crazy country boy thang for Bucky Covington. How can you not love that boy? He's all "y'all" and "ev'body" and "yessir". Then he opens his mouth and becomes better than every country star I've ever seen. He rocks. He rolls. He makes me forget I hate country music.

Okay. I'm hooked again. The divorce is off.

AI + Shonda 4ever TLA.

What did y'all think?