A guest judge... maybe?!?!

Note to AI Producers: Please let Clive sit at the big kids table Tuesday night.

Would you just give us a little excitement? HUH?!?

Tuesday night, Clive Davis is scheduled to appear on the Idol to add his knowledgable 2 cents about the final 3. Clive is like the Pope of pop for those of you that don't know who I'm talking about. A press release states he's scheduled to appear, but there's no word on what the format will be or if he'll just be speaking on that crazy big screen instead of speaking live from say A CHAIR AT THE TABLE (hint, hint..... producers!). And dont write me Catholics... I'm down with the Pope and all, I'm just saying... he's big and all... you know....

Anyway, we may get a little boost.

See, everyone talked about how they hated the guest judges and all in previous seasons... well look what all your whining brought you this year people. No press and curls from the 80's disco star has beens. No great celebrity opinions while the contestants slave away at their side at the piano somewhere. No double Paula like don't want to hurt anyone's feelings comments from the artists that didn't want to burn their slim to none chance at a comeback. No nothing.

.....aaaahhhhh... those were the days. Can we get a little Clive in the house Tuesday night?

Can we just get a little bit of guest judge?

I'm out.

Thank goodness that's over...

I'm talking about the pain that was Anthony Federov.

Thank goodness that's over.

WOW.

I was getting worried. I was beginning to think the whole world was on crack (except for me, Shonda and the guy who delivers my Fed Ex at work... dreamy looking and anyone that on time and reliable cannot be on crack... ANYWAY)....

But now you have voted him off and all is well. So the final 3 will duel it out next week.

Vonzell will belt something else out while wearing an o.k. dress and heels that are obviously WAY too high for her to walk well in let alone shake her very bootyliscous booty. And her dad and brothers will be there in all their pimp looking glory.

Bo will wear another cool I'm too sexy for this show hip shirt, contrasted with the starkly center parted I'm sooooooo stuck on the 80's and all that crack I smoked hair and sing another great rendition of something we all know. And Randy will say he worked it out.

Carrie will be shown milking another cow before putting on another great Martina McBride performance in a Stepford Wives dress that Paula will randomly claim she looks beautiful in.

And we'll all say....

SO FREAKIN' WHAT.

I'm sorry. It just slipped out. I'm trying to pretend I'm excited this year... but there's something wrong with this show this time. Does anyone else know what I'm talking about? I mean, where's the glitz and surprise of the stylist transformations and makeover mistakes we all looked forward to when the top 10 were crowned? Where are the shots of them by the pool in their finalist mansion? What happened to the sponsorship from Old Navy or Gap or whoever the heck it was that had them all matchy poo-poo in those group numbers every week that we made so much fun of? This year they're in what looks like some cheap apartments somewhere and have been left to their own curling irons, shopping trips to Wal-Mart to pick out outfits and Bonne Bell makeup. WHAT HAPPENED? We got nothing ya'll.

This year we got Ghetto Idol ya'll. No budget, no glitz, no glamour. No nothing. Just a bunch of kids singing and whining when they get kicked out the door.

sigh...... deep breath...

O.k. I got it all out.

So what were we talking about?

Oh yeah... the final 3.

I would like to see Vonzell the quiet, unassuming US Postal Worker with the whitest teeth I've ever seen win. It makes a nice story. But all 3 are good and it would be interesting to see what the heck they'd do with a country star on their oh so pop label.... so go on Carrie with your bad self. But alas... in the end it will probably be Bo standing in all the confetti singing some creepy song written for him by someone they dig up from the grave to surpise us. Bo with a choir behind him?!?! I think not. But stranger things have happened on Idol....

I'm out.